Today is my mama’s 56th birthday. I have found myself growing noticeably more anxious as this day has approached. This year, we will be marking an age she will never reach. It was tempting to ignore it and to avoid dealing with this emotional roller coaster of grief as it hurtles towards yet another gut-wrenching twist.
However, to ignore it…to ignore her, seems so much worse. I don’t want this day to be just like any other, because it is not just any day. It is special. It is my mother’s birthday. I choose to continue to celebrate this day despite her physical absence. I choose to remember her, even if those memories end up sneaking out of my eyes and rolling down my cheeks.
was is my biggest cheerleader. Her unwavering faith in my potential often frustrated me. In my eye, it often seemed misplaced and unwarranted. So this year for my mother’s 56th birthday I am stepping outside of my comfort zone and giving her a different kind of gift. I am gifting her a little faith in myself. With that faith, I am going to pursue this creative outlet which she has for years been encouraging me to start.